Saw the surgeon today. He confirmed what I suspected: I need a mastectomy of my right breast & Chemotherapy. I can start Chemo before the surgery to make sure the cancer stays where it is & doesn't go on a little trip anywhere else in my body (only I get to travel in this body!).
Next week I get a bone scan & other testing to be sure it hasn't already spread. At some point soon I will lose my hair--- that I FINALLY love! But I'll shave my head & get a free wig from the American Cancer Society & it'll grow back. And on the good side, as long as the cancer hasn't spread & is gone after surgery & Chemo, I can get new boobs! ...I think, since I get to choose this time, I might go up a size! ;)
Sadly the Chemo might cut my chances of ever being pregnant & all that, but I guess I can adopt a Chinese baby one day. I am really sad about that one since I've always wanted to be pregnant & give birth and all, but I guess this is just life.
I'm convinced & certain that something great will come as a result of this--- whether it be that my niece grows up to cure cancer, my new boobs help my career (sadly that's kind of a possibility with acting!), I inspire a book or a movie or play, or I write one, or simply that the suggested age of a first mammogram drop to 30-- fuck it, 20! This disease is hitting the young too much! Whatever happens I'm glad I have my friends & most of my family, and I'm glad I have positivity & happiness...and school starts Monday!!! Woo-hoo!
Keep bugging Ellen to help me & keep those fingers crossed Medicaid comes through. Hell, as long as the doctors treat me they can send me bills for the rest of my life--- which will be VERY long!!! They can't just let me die, right?...they can't, right? FINGERS CROSSED FOLKS!!!!
Thanks! & keep reading my posts for more updates...it's easier than replying to a bunch of emails individually.
xxxo <3
Marie :)
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